Virtually every night is Hockey Night in Canada (logo via WikiMedia)
Hockey Night in Canada: Tampa Bay @ Montreal (Game 3)
Sunday 7 PM
Hockey Night in Canada is pretty much every night in Canada this week. So, why not see what all the fuss is about?
Sunday 10 PM
WGN America’s first original drama swears witches are real and it makes its debut here at the same day and time as it does in the US. While the promos look intense, the reviews
at best. They suggest Salem
is ho-hum and WGN America is just yet another cable network trying its hand at reinventing itself through original dramas the way of FX, AMC, History, Lifetime, BBC America, OWN, MTV and virtually every other channel if you count reality TV.
Sunday 10 PM
In the season two premiere, Marisol finds love, Alejandro and Carmen’s fake relationship settles and…I’m sorry I just can’t, even for what is essentially a Desperate Housewifes redux, this all just sounds so terrible.
Sunday 9 PM
BBC One’s historical drama The Musketeers finally makes its way over the pond to BBC Canada. It’s a retelling of sorts of the famous Three Musketeers story, but I can’t understand why there are four musketeers in the show. Is that simply creative license or do I just need to actually read the book to understand?
Monday-Thursday 8:30 PM
For those too young to remember Goosebumps or Are You Afraid of the Dark? this has to be the craziest most original thing ever on TV. While it is called The Haunting Hour, it’s just a half an hour long, but YTV fixed that problem by running two episodes back to back.
Tuesday 9 PM
In the season six finale the makeup artists have to make two aliens that need to live through a dance performance, while everyone at home speculates how this series made it to season six. Hypnosis? Bribes? Free MAC makeup?
Tuesday 10 PM
Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott star in another reality show because…you know what, they don’t have to explain anything to you. Just shut up and watch the thing. You know you want to.
Tuesday 10:30 PM
In this new comedy two best friends are mistaken as lesbians and just roll with it cause, you know, they’re like crazy popular now, and stuff, and yeah. I mean, like wouldn’t you totally do like the same thing? …Why are you looking at me like that?
Thursday 8 PM
Pawneeians and Eagletonians unite to try to figure out how the hell they got renewed for another season with ratings as dreadful as theirs. Season seven nonetheless.
Thursday 9 PM
Remember those awful little random Digital Shorts SNL
used to run during the show? Now NBC compiled them into a two-hour special. Why? Well, what else would you do if you’ve been pulverized in the ratings on Thursday night? No, really, NBC wants to know and they’ll give you your own show if your idea is any good. No joke
Thursday 9:30 PM
I bet somewhere Gerry Dee is sulking saying CBS stole his idea from his show about a lousy teacher, Mr. D, but CBS “stole” this idea from the movie Bad Teacher. In any case, TV is mighty original these days, isn’t it?
Thursday 10 PM
Are you ready to see another ABC drama’s ratings sink like a stone this season (or fail to launch period)? What, Betrayal, Killer Women, Mind Games, The Assets, Once Upon a Time in Wonderland and Lucky 7 weren’t enough for you? Well, you’re in luck. The folks over at ABC decided to order this drama about a bipolar neuroscientist right to series despite that NBC’s show about a bipolar neurosurgeon pulled in such low ratings last season that it was cancelled after two episodes. Genius move, ABC.
Friday 10 PM
Unemployed deadbeats Terry and Dean live at home with their single mom. While she’s busy paying the bills by working in a factory and then supplying goods stolen from the factory to an illegal immigrant, Dean beats his girlfriend and kills a passerby who watched the whole thing. Terry, on the other hand, just watched the murder take place. Yup, it’s all rainbows and lollipops here.
Friday 8 PM
Season three draws to a close and despite being shifted to one of the worst timeslots in TV, Last Man Standing still delivers. Yet, I can’t think of a single person who watches this show. Very suspect.