If you can’t wait for the new fall season to start, then you’re in luck. Shaw Media cable networks HGTV, History and Slice decided to kick off things early by dropping a whole bunch of premieres this week. The bad news though is none of them look that great.
On HGTV you have homeowners blindly trusting Bryan Baeumler of Disaster DIY with their homes on Leave It To Bryan on Monday, the third season premiere of Holmes Makes It Right on Tuesday, homeowners using rental income to fund a vacation home on Vacation Home for Free on Wednesday and finally, Thursday gives us My Big Family Renovation which is on a husband and wife team with five kids moving into a home that needs severe renovations.
History delivers yet another series that uses a “pawn” pun in the title with Pawnography on Tuesday. Wednesday gives us the start of a new season of Ice Road Truckers, as well as the launch of the brand new Biker Battleground Phoenix immediately after. On Thursday we have the debut of the perplexingly titled Down East Dickering, which is apparently about people who use a classified ad magazine to get odd jobs and trade to make cash. To cap off the week there’s the documentary series, Treasures Decoded.
Over on Slice, we have the launch of the Online Dating Rituals of the American Male. (Spoiler alert: The rituals aren’t that much of a mystery, it’s pretty much anything they can think of that will get them laid.) While that show is about the start of relationships, the following night Slice has Handsome Devils, a series about relationships going horribly wrong and ending in murder. Quite a contrast isn’t it?
|Show||Episode Title||Day and Time||Network(s)|
|Leave It To Bryan||Between Gyprock & a Hard Place||Monday 10 p.m.||HGTV|
|Pawnography||Wheel and Deal||Tuesday 10 p.m.||History|
|Holmes Makes It Right||Here in Spirit||Tuesday 9 p.m.||HGTV|
|Legends||Pilot||Wednesday 9 p.m.||Bravo|
|Ice Road Truckers||The Gathering Storm||Wednesday 9 p.m.||History|
|Biker Battleground Phoenix||Throwdown||Wednesday 10 p.m.||History|
|Vacation House For Free||—||Wednesday 10 p.m.||HGTV|
|Online Dating Rituals of the American Male||Marcus & Alex||Thursday 9 p.m.||Slice|
|Down East Dickering||Dickering 101||Thursday 10 p.m.||History|
|My Big Family Renovation||The Big Move||Thursday 10 p.m.||HGTV|
|Treasures Decoded||Bust of Nefertiti||Friday 8 p.m.||History|
|Handsome Devils||Hurricane Love||Friday 8 p.m.||Slice|
Sunday’s packed with season/series finales. HBO Canada has the finale of Sensitive Skin (check out my review of the premiere if you want to learn more about it) and the series finale of True Blood. Also up against the finale of True Blood is The Last Ship on Space and the dud of a reality show Rising Star.
Wednesday sees the end of Motive on ABC (CTV’s carrying it in simulcast) and Much also has the finale of Comedy Bang! Bang! on Wednesday. On Thursday watch in amazement as Welcome to Sweden merely ends its season and not the series on a whole as it’s been picked up for another one.
|Show||Episode Title||Day and Time||Network(s)|
|Sensitive Skin||The Return of the Other Davina||Sunday 8 p.m.||HBO Canada|
|True Blood||Thank You||Sunday 9 p.m.||HBO Canada|
|The Last Ship||No Place Like Home||Sunday 9 p.m.||Space|
|Rising Star||—||Sunday 9 p.m.||CTV/ABC|
|Chelsea Lately||—||Tuesday 11 p.m.||E!|
|Motive||For You I Die||Wednesday 10 p.m.||CTV/ABC|
|Comedy Bang! Bang!||Zach Galifianakis Wears a Santa Suit||Wednesday 10:30 p.m.||Much|
|Inside Amy Schumer||Slut-Shaming||Wednesday 11:30 p.m.||Much|
|Welcome to Sweden||Home/Återförening||Thursday 9:30 p.m.||NBC|
2014 MTV Video Music Awards
Sunday 9 p.m.
Oh this is going to be a hell of a show. Ariana Grande (and Zedd), Nicki Minaj, Beyonce, Iggy Azalea (and Rita Ora), Sam Smith and a bunch more take the stage. Beyonce and Iggy Azalea both tied for the most nominations with eight while Eminem is not far behind with seven.
The 66th Primetime Emmy Awards
Monday 8 p.m.
Don’t tell me they moved the Emmys so it wouldn’t conflict with the VMAs. Not that the Emmys seems to mean much anymore now that Netflix and PBS each have more nominations (11) than ABC (8), NBC (8), CBS (9) and Fox (3). Actually, top dog HBO (36) has more awards than ABC, NBC, CBS and Fox combined. What has happened to network TV? Just embarrassing…
The 100 Greatest Music Videos Ever
Saturday 11 a.m.
Much goes back to its roots for a few hours and airs the 100 greatest videos of all time.
Saturday 8 p.m.
This half-hour special shows that Much has never really gotten over its awkward years, but it sure as hell has gotten over music videos. It’s the very least Bell could’ve done for its 30th anniversary…literally, TSN’s getting three freaking spinoff channels for its 30th anniversary.
Inside Teen Suicide
Saturday 10 p.m.
For one of its last nights as CTS before morphing into YES TV, CTS is airing a special documentary on the causes of teen suicide and how to prevent it.
(Featured Image via Shaw Media)